I am a Project

My friends has taken me on as a project.  It should bother me -- but it doesn't.  I just had my sixth baby.  I have become over weight.  I've lost strength and I love my food.  I am an emotional eater all the way.  Why it doesn't bother me that my friend has taken be on as a project is because my friend knows me.  She knows that my life was shaken to the core when my twins were born over 5 years ago.  She knows that I am the happiest when I'm fit and healthy and running.  She knows that this past year I was the sickest I have ever been in my entire life.  She knows that the Lord handed me a surprise when life was just starting to feel normal again.  She knows that I just want to feel like myself again and right now, I am not myself.  My friend knows I need help.  I am so grateful that I have a friend like her.

My friend wants me to do something that feels impossible right.  I remember 6 years ago after a friend party we had for Halloween my friend and I were dreaming.  We dreamed of doing a certain race that takes a lot of commitment.  A lot of strength.  A lot of ambition.  We laughed.  We planned.  We built up each other's courage.  We committed.  Well, a few month later she was pregnant.  Nine months after that I was pregnant -- and had my twins.  Well, she asked me a few weeks ago if I would train with her and do this race with her in a year.  A whole year.  My heart is racing thinking about it. I hear doubts in the back of my head, but the excitement of doing it is screaming louder then the fear of not.  She knows I want to do this race.  She knows I don't want to be left behind.  She knows.  So the project has begun.  I am her project.  I am committing to getting healthy.  Losing the weight.  Gaining strength and building endurance.

I'm too nervous to say what race we are planning.  It's almost like if I say it out loud the universe will laugh and my courage will burst.  Time.  I need time to show myself that all things are possible!

New Birth

Oh boy! When I typed that phrase "New Birth" I realized that it has so many meanings to my life right now.  When I first thought of it, I was only thinking of how I'm starting again.  I'm going to start writing my blog again because it's such a great motivator for me to remember and write my life's story; so my blog is getting a "rebirth to it".  I have also just come inside from being outside in my gardens and the new birth of plants just invigorates my soul.  Sounds cheese . . . but seriously.  And third, the biggest meaning to the phrase "new birth" is because my pregnancy -- my last, unexpected pregnancy -- is coming to an end and that end finishes with a "new birth" into our family.  Baby Number Six.

Sunsets in Idaho are gorgeous.  This spring has been a very windy one.  Just two days ago we had 30 mile an hour winds come through with gusts up to 50 miles an hour.  On nights like tonight I forget about those days and how much I hated Idaho then.  Just a moment of beauty that calms my soul realizing that I get this scene just from looking out my back windows or stepping out onto our back deck.  During this moment, I love where I live.